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May I Help You?

Compiled by UNT Computing Center Helpdesk Staff

People ask/say the darndest things. Below are some questions that have been fielded by the Computing Center Helpdesk during the past several weeks. Enjoy. - Ed.

I already graduated and sold my math book. Can you tell which is the x-axis and which is the y-axis, the line that goes up and down or the line that goes left/right?
I know the dial-up is down, but my Kazaa cannot get anywhere near 30k/sec.
We need the air conditioner turned down in the Gateway building. Its freezing in here.
Can I speak to "Elizabeth Hurley"?<Who!?>

Elizabeth Hurley!<Are you sure?>

Yes.<Elizabeth who?>

HURLEY!<Do you mean Elizabeth Hinkle-Turner?>

No! Hurley!

HELP...........I CAN'T PLAY MY WINDOWS 95 SOLITAIRE IT COMES UP "ILLEGAL OPERATION". CAN I GET IT BACK WITHOUT REMOVING MY YAHOO MESSENGER? THANKS..
Do you happen to know what the bed sheet sizes are for the dorm rooms?
I need to activate service for my internet box that these guys just installed.

<is it a dial up account you need activated?>

No, it's an internet box. They said to call you.

Hi...uhh....uhhh.. I need to...uhh... connect my Playstation 2 to play games online... Can you remove the uhhh... firewall and uhh... give me a separate IP address for the Playstation?
Do you have a first aid kit? I need some ointment, like Neosporin.
These email attachments in my Inbox are about 4400 KEG-A-BYTES.
I've been trying to log into Eaglemail all day and it won't let me

<ok, are you at Eaglemail now?>

No, how do I get to Eaglemail?

I heard that the Lambda Chi's were in trouble for hazing. Do you know anything about that?
I know they're blocking Kazaa in the dorms, but can you tell me how to get around that?
If I get DSL from Verizon, will it still be the same Internet as my UNT Dial-up?"
While sitting at the front desk wearing my badge and talking on the phone. Girl walks in and asks: "Do you work here?"
Can you guys come shovel snow on Highland and Ave. C?
Each year I receive a form from UNT showing how much I spent on tuition so I can get a tax write-off.

My neighbors received a form this year, but I haven't. How can I get one?

Hello, I'm calling because I'm sick and won't be able to come to class today
I can't log into my GroupWise email

.... 5 minutes later....

well, I can't get to the login page because my internet connection hasn't been working.

I go to CNN.com, and that's fine, BUT, then I go and type the address for Google.com, and it goes to Google, but it deletes CNN. (35 minute call)
What's the difference between a hard drive and an operating system, because I spilled a drink on my laptop.
Right click on the text . . . How do I do that?