Counselor offers suggestions to support co-workers in crisis

It's often hard to know what to say to a co-worker who is experiencing a crisis situation, such as a death in the family, divorce, illness or devastating loss of property. But compassion can help you deal with a co-worker who is in crisis, says John Hipple, counseling psychologist in counseling and testing services. He shares his thoughts about helping a colleague through hard times:

• Remember that emotional pain is real to the sufferer. Your co-worker's current crisis might seem simple to you, but it could be "the straw that broke the camel's back" to him or her.
• Consider your co-worker's personality and your own emotional health. Ask yourself if your co-worker is a private or public person. Ask yourself how much emotional energy you can offer.
• Don't enable, rescue, judge, take on another's burdens or give unsolicited advice. If your co-worker wants to talk, listen. If your co-worker does not want to talk, respect that choice. Instead of giving advice, say something like, "You look like you're having a tough time. Can I help with anything?"
• Offering flexibility could make the difference in recovery from trauma. If you're a supervisor, consider adjusting your employee's schedule, offering information about sick leave, vacation leave, health care and employee assistance program benefits.
• Good eating, rest, relaxation and laughter are helpful interventions. If your co-worker is open to the idea, go out to lunch together. Focus on fun topics.
• Healing or getting back to normal after a dramatic event takes time. Be patient with your co-worker. People need time to rebound from trauma, and recovery rates are very individual.

BY CATHY CASHIO ccashio@unt.edu

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